Poly Talk Tuesday Discussion: Is being poly an orientation or a lifestyle??

Are some people “born non monogamous” or is polyamory or ENM just something we agree to “do”?

Last updated:
March 12, 2024
Contributed by:
Jessie Rushing

Identity questioning

This topic comes up over and over in our community. Polyamory is absolutely an “identity”, but what does that mean?

Choice vs Innate

Is it something that we are innately born with a desire for, or is it a style of relationship agreement we make when we enter a relationship.  Could it be both?  

Here are some questions

To help kick off the discussion in the comments below please ponder these questions:

We want to hear from you!

Tell us what YOU think in the comments below…

How does the phrase “only relationships can be polyamorous”  make you feel? 
People don’t stop being bisexual or pansexual when they are in a straight presenting relationship, but are you still poly if you're currently in a monogamous relationship?
Do you recall any "aha" moments in your life that made you think, "Maybe I'm into this whole polyamory thing"?
How do you think your other identities (your gender, sexuality, background) intersect with your approach to polyamory?
Have you seen anyone do a full 180 from hardcore monogamy to "I'm here for all the love"?
And, what about ambiamourous people that say they can be happy in either a monogamous or polyamorous relationship? 

Talk amongst yourselves.

Photo by Luwadlin Bosman on Unsplash

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Jessie Rushing
Jessie has been practicing solo-polyamory since 2014, and is this site's glorious and illustrious founder. When not building JustPolyThings.com she enjoys building other websites, trail running, and hosting polycule play parties.
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